Do's and Don'ts 美国红娘的相亲攻略
上图中这位名叫Christie Nightingale，是一名在美国纽约、华盛顿、费城都有分公司的职业红娘。而且她还是个专门给百万富翁相亲的“大款红娘”。
虽然现在交友网站在美国是众多单身男女寻觅对象的主要战场，但对有钱没时间的大款来说，想找到真爱还是掏钱找这样的大款红娘比较高效率。安排了无数次相亲之后，有着10000名男女信息数据库的Christie Nightingale说，相亲的第一面是非常重要的，可以说基本决定了两人有戏与否，因此下面就是若干条她给的相亲“要/不要”攻略，我们中国人也可以参考参考：
Don’t look someone up on the Internet prior to your date and then discuss your findings. This is creepy. The reason why you are on a date is to learn about the other person; why bother if you are going to do your own investigation from behind the safe haven of your computer screen.
不要在约会前就用互联网查探对方的背景，然后在见面时讨论你在网上发现了什么。这让人很不舒服。你去相亲就是抱着了解对方的目的去的，要是你只想躲在电脑屏幕后面做自己的调查哪又有什么必要见面呢？
Do enjoy getting to know someone by directly asking questions about their life. But, you don’t have to learn or reveal everything on a first date! Keep an air of mystery flowing.
要享受用直接提问的方式来了解对方。不过也不用在第一次约会就把什么都了解什么都解密了。应该留点惊喜的空间。
Don’t wear any old thing. First impressions are lasting impressions. This rule applies especially to the ladies. It may sound old fashioned, but the reality is that men are very visually oriented.
不要穿旧衣服。第一印象决定一切。对女性而言尤其是这样。虽然这么说感觉很过时，但现实依旧是男人就是视觉动物。
Do swap your pearls for sexier jewelry and change your work blouse to something more festive if you are meeting right after the office.
要戴些性感的首饰，而不是工作装加珍珠项链，即便你们是下班后直接去见面的。
Don’t talk about past relationships. All too often, I get feedback that a client ruined a date by going on and on about his/her ex.
不要谈论上一段感情。有很多次我都会发现有客户会因为喋喋不休地谈论前任而想相亲失败。
Do stick with upbeat, neutral topics especially on a first or second date.
要多谈些轻松愉快的话题，特别是第一次或者第二次约会时。
Don’t continually talk about yourself. No one finds a Talking Head to be attractive.
不要一直谈论你自己。没人喜欢滔滔不绝说个不停的人。
Do ask questions and be attentive. You already know yourself, wouldn’t it be wise to learn about your date and find out what you have in common?
要多提问，细心听。你已经知道你自己了，抓住机会多了解下相亲对象，看看两人有没有共同点不是更重要的嘛。
Don’t be a complainer. Some people habitually criticize the food, the wine, the weather, or life in general and are consequently perceived as negative and unpleasant.
不要抱怨个不停。有些人会习惯性地挑刺，食物、红酒、天气或者生活都能抱怨，这种人会显得非常消极而且让人不快。
Do monitor your attitude and if you can’t find something positive to say about a subject refrain from saying anything. Your date will also be watching how you treat other people in order to discover how you will treat them when you are not on best behavior.
要注意自己的态度。要是找不到什么可以称赞的地方，就不要说了。对方也会注意看你是如何对待旁人的，从而判断今后你不再端着时会怎么对待他。
Don’t shut down if you aren’t instantly attracted to your date. Chemistry is crucial to any relationship but your initial response can change—sometimes after only 15 minutes! By shutting down, you are sabotaging what could be a wonderful match.
不要因为第一眼没看中而马上放弃。魅力固然对来电很重要，但第一印象是可以改变的，有时候过了15分钟就会有截然不同的发现。直接放弃的话，你可能会错过一个绝佳对象。
Do remain engaged through the entire course of a date. If you meet someone who you think is a great person but “not your type,” meet them for a second, third, or fourth date. You may be surprised at the feelings that blossom.
要在整个相亲过程中全心投入。如果你觉得对象是个非常不错的人，只是“不是你的型”。再跟他们约会几次吧。说不定两人会在后来碰出火花呢。
Do be on best behavior.
要拿出最佳仪态。
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Translated by JuliaD |
发表于 2011-8-24 08:05
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